I've had the wonderful blessing in the last couple of months of meeting with a group of believers for fellowship and worship in their homes. We've spent time worshiping and sharing our hearts and faith with each other and I have been so blessed and encouraged. The other night, one of the sweet women that are part of this group said something that has changed my life.
She said, "I'm just happy with my life. I'm happy being "C's" wife, I'm happy living in Big Rapids. I'm happy with whatever God is doing."
And I realized something.
I had been discontent. And that was not OK.
Twenty years ago, we lived in Auburn, Alabama. We attended an Assembly of God church and the Lord had led me to start a worship dance ministry and to sing in the choir. While we were attending there, the Lord brought 'revival.'
The Holy Spirit fell on our church. We began to have church 6 nights a week and we would stay until midnight, praising God, dancing at the altar, laying on our faces before God and moving in the Spirit. It lasted for five months and over 700 people were saved. The students from Auburn University were preaching Jesus from the street corners. It was amazing.
I saw God do things during those 5 months that I had never seen before and have never seen since. The Lord would show me a couple of years later that my obedience to start the worship dance ministry and to dance on the altar while in the choir were one of the keys that brought the revival. He would also remind me that He had told me to say the words to a song in a medley that we were going to dance to before we danced and this released the revival.
The words were, "Cast out your nets all you fishers of men,
In the power of the Spirit, revival begins!"
I was able to go back and watch video of myself introducing this dance medley and then watch as the Holy Spirit fell on our church!
I have never been the same. God wrecked me in those 5 months and I still have not recovered. I have pressed in, pushed forward, interceded, sought God and contended for break-through since that time.
But when my friend spoke those words - "I'm just happy where I'm at"- I realized that I had also been very discontent. The Lord had asked me a couple of months ago - "What are you looking for in a church?" and I had answered without hesitation, "I want that revival again! I want to see You move and see people healed and saved and delivered! I don't want a meeting! I want YOU!"
And I have realized in the last couple of weeks, as I have given my heart and life over to God once again and repented of my discontent, that it's good to pray and intercede for break-through. I am a warrior and it will always be who I am. But at the same time, I have to trust God and rest in His Sovereignty and wisdom. I have to trust Him that even though I may feel that all I do is move forward into the wilderness and dig up the dry ground, that God sees me and knows my heart.
And I have to submit my life and make peace with the fact that I may never again experience a move of God like I did, but my prayers have made the way for others to experience this wonderful blessing.
I've found a new peace in the last couple of weeks and a fresh joy. I hadn't realize that I had taken on a false burden and now I've laid it at the feet of the only One Who is able to carry it.
Philippians 4:11 ...I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am.
love and blessings~